Chaotic Serendipity
by cym70
Summary: Pearls shouldn't have secrets, but they do. Blue Pearl and Yellow Pearl begin to understand each other and everything changes. (Part 3 of Finding Stars in Desolate Skies)
1. Chapter 1

Blue Diamond's Pearl has lived—lived an impossible life—for thousands of years and she is glad. Happiness is not something she ever expected to feel, but there is a tiny speck of it within her, just as there has been since she saw that one dangerous, rebellious Pearl. She likes to think herself rebellious too, though she cannot be rebellious like that Pearl was—she carries no swords and claims no allegiance to a greater force. What she has, what she does, what she is—it is quiet rebellion, the kind that dares to exist in the courts and goes unnoticed, breeding strength in Pearls that were never meant to have it.

Blue Diamond's Pearl does many things she is not meant to now, but on the outside she sculpts herself to be an obedient, unobtrusive Pearl. The dichotomy delights her and terrifies her, because she fears one day someone—her Diamond, most likely—will see through this thin veneer that hides her treason.

She shares what she knows, plays images of it in quiet corners during rest cycles, one Pearl at a time. She is a vessel, but she takes more pride in that than she ever has in her duties to Blue Diamond.

There aren't many remnants of old stories that are still allowed to circulate, but she has begun to see their effects everywhere. The room the Pearls are given for their rest cycle is not monitored, but there are gems that wait outside and no one dares speak above a whisper. There are subtle things too, things that could be written off if one didn't know the history. All of the Diamonds have their methods of protecting themselves, she realizes as the years go by in slow and quick succession.

Blue—Her own Diamond clings to her Pearl, too afraid that a change will bring her one that is less submissive, less safe, less trustworthy. Funny things to worry about, she thinks, when Pearls are said to be nothing but these things. Pearls aren't supposed to think for themselves, or so they are intent on saying. What could be safer than that? What could be more dangerous?

White—She throws away her Pearls like they are meaningless trinkets—they are—and gets nervous about keeping them around for long, though she laughs it off as the whims of an elite. The new ones are less likely to start getting ideas, she supposes, but it still hurts to see these scared, breakable Pearls who know from the moment they are made that their existence will be cut short.

Yellow—She is an odd case, even amongst the Diamonds. She has no time for frivolity and wants her Pearls to be useful, just like the gems she commands, but at the same time never allows them chances to learn, because Pearls can't. If they don't catch on right away, they are ordered to be shattered, no point trying to show them how things work again. They're faulty products. She's not sure how the current Pearl has managed to hang on so long, but she admires the learning curve she must possess to have done so. She'll likely be gone soon, though. Yellow Diamond might not shatter her Pearls quite as liberally as White Diamond, but she certainly doesn't hesitate to do so.

Yellow Diamond's Pearl makes her almost nervous—she is too expressive, too smug, too see-through with emotions Pearls are not meant to have. She has only met her in passing, never truly spoken to her, but she is always surprised to see that she has not yet been replaced when their Diamonds attend meetings together. Pearls that act like that don't usually last long.

Blue Diamond's Pearl sees many Pearls come and go, but she is best acquainted with those beneath the Diamonds. The other Pearls—all sorts, all kinds, all beautiful and empty—should be the same, but they are different. They try harder when making the Diamonds' Pearls. Others are allowed tiny, miniscule defects as long as they don't interfere with their work. Other Pearls act differently too. She sees some that dance, some that clean, some that stand as still as statues. She sees some that remind her of _that Pearl_ , who have a little too much strength behind their eyes. There are more of them, these days. But all of them know better than to act like anything other than just a Pearl.

She spreads her story in whispers, in touches, in silence. Transmits it in flashes, small holographic projections, spreading it to Pearl after Pearl. It is a slow process, and she aches with all the Pearls she is too late for, all the ones that are crushed without ever having any hope.

But she cannot be caught.

Being a Diamond's Pearl gives her some leeway that the others do not have. She learns how to get Pearls alone, learns it is safest to pass on her message in small projections in the middle of a rest cycle. It's risky, but no one is watching. She never asks them to pass the memory on, because she could not live with the guilt if one of them were shattered for it. They do pass it on sometimes, she thinks, but she never asks. This is her burden, her obligation, not theirs.

She cannot be caught.

She is that Pearl's legacy, and she must continue to exist so that it can be spread to the others. She must play her part and she must commit high treason directly under Blue Diamond's supervision. No one can suspect her, not even for a moment.

She cannot be caught.

She fears it will never be enough, because not every Pearl will get to hear and see this Pearl, but she does everything she can.

She cannot be caught.

In some ways she is hardly a Pearl anymore, and in some ways she is more of a Pearl than she has ever been.

* * *

Rest cycles are habitual, boring things, and Yellow Diamond's Pearl despises them with a passion she should not have. Rest may help a Pearl function better according to the reports, but she could do so much more for her Diamond if she were just allowed to bring a screen or two in with her. She is not allowed this. Pearls must rest.

They sit quietly, small murmurs passing between some of the Pearls, but nothing important. Pearls never say anything important.

Everyone has their place, which they claim—don't claim, Pearls don't claim anything—each time. The only exception to this is Blue Diamond's Pearl, who is an oddity. She moves about the room, one or two spaces over from where she was the previous time, occasionally backtracking but never stopping. It's unusual, but she is the oldest Pearl there and anyone with that dubious honor can have her idiosyncrasies overlooked. It hurts no Pearl, and does not affect anyone's work.

It does bother Yellow Diamond's Pearl though. She can't help but think she is _missing_ something. She is not sure if it's her that is missing it or Blue Diamond's Pearl that is missing it, but something is missing and something is wrong and she does not like it. It does not matter that she does not like it, because she is just a Pearl and it is just a rest cycle, like always. She ignores that Pearl, and yet cannot ignore her at all.

Rest cycles happen at such long intervals that Blue Diamond's Pearl has yet to end up beside her, but it will happen soon if she continues this pattern. Yellow Diamond's Pearl makes a note to herself that she will not engage in any discussion when it does, just close her eyes and wait out the time they are required to spend in the room. It's a shame, because she occasionally enjoys the shared conversation with the Pearl to her right—a twitchy thing that serves a Quartz she's never met and wears a thin sheer wrap that falls to her ankles but gets bunched up in her hands when she starts thinking too much. They don't say much, but they share a similar dislike for the cycles and she does appreciate the chance to speak to a Pearl that is a little bit more than a mindless spectacle. Pearls are mindless spectacles though, she tells herself. That is all they are.

She exchanges a brief look with the Pearl beside her and they wait out the time together in silence, pretending they are not terrified by this lack of _doing_ , pretending there is solace in the fact that the Pearl beside them feels the same, pretending they will do this again and again and again while the Pearls around them come and go and come and go and they feel nothing.

* * *

The next time the rest cycle comes around, Blue Diamond's Pearl is beside her. She keeps her eyes shut, as planned, and does not speak. She doesn't know what she's scared of, but she is scared all the way through, and her gem burns hot in her chest. Something tells her that if she so much as dares to question this Pearl beside her she will regret it with her whole being.

But she can't stop her from speaking, even if she makes sure to show no sign of interest.

"Hello." She sounds like every other Pearl, multiplied a hundred times into a voice that is exactly weak enough in its melody not to cause alarm.

Yellow Diamond's Pearl cracks open her eyes but does not answer.

"Can we talk?" Blue Diamond's Pearl asks.

"The whole point of the rest cycle is _resting_ ," she mutters dismissively.

"It won't take long. Here," she breathes, holding her hands just in front of her gem. It begins to glow, ready to project.

Yellow Diamond's Pearl scrambles backwards so quickly a handful of others nearby begin staring.

"Shh." The glow stops immediately and Blue Diamond's Pearl places her hands in her lap, looking perfectly calm and blank.

"What do you think you're doing?" she hisses once the attention is directed away from them once more.

Blue Diamond's Pearl raises her head just slightly. "I have something to show you."

"I don't want any part of it," she snaps immediately.

There might be a small, nearly imperceptible change at the corner of her lips, but Yellow Diamond's Pearl has no patience for these subtle clues unless they come from her Diamond. "You need to know," the other Pearl insists, and for a moment she is scared motionless by the certainty in her voice, in these few words, when everything else she hears from this Pearl has always just been "My Diamond" and murmurs of assent as she goes about her duties.

She turns her head away. She cannot, will not, let this Pearl get into her head. She has no time for anything but her service. She cannot get distracted by this one strange, too-perfect Pearl.

There is the light brush of fingertips on the back of her hand, but she snatches it away and turns her back on the other Pearl.

That one is dangerous, and she is too valuable a Pearl to get involved.


	2. Chapter 2

Blue Diamond's Pearl isn't sure what to think of her anymore. She's never had a Pearl outright refuse her offer before, they're all taught from the beginning that that isn't something a Pearl _does_. The behavior persists even when it is only Pearls alone, which is troubling but helpful to her. This deviation that Yellow Diamond's Pearl presents is strange to her, but she has cultured a rebellious spirit inside herself over the years and she kind of likes the strength in that refusal. No doubt the other Pearl is still scared and fragile, like all Pearls are, constantly, but she channels it in a different fashion.

It is just somewhat maddening that this defensive strategy leaves her unwilling to listen, to accept something new into her imperfect little world.

Blue Diamond's Pearl will have to try again, some other time. She will feel as though she has failed in her task if she lets this go. But she won't force it, because Pearls break easily and she refuses to be the cause of it. Her story is meant for hope, not fear. She will not dishonor the renegade Pearl by forcing it upon anyone.

* * *

Life as a Pearl, even Yellow Diamond's Pearl, is repetitive. She can go through the motions without thinking, though she dares not. She files reports, answers calls, listens as her Diamond meets with various gems.

Diamond meetings are sporadic but always stressful. Not one, but three pairs of eyes on her. Two more Pearls beside her as well, and she has to try and remind her Diamond that she is the best of the best and should not be exchanged for something new.

Blue Diamond's Pearl is there, of course, but Yellow Diamond's Pearl refuses to look at her. It's easy to avoid each other because Pearls aren't meant to converse in settings like this—that is reserved for outside the courts, and even then only in soft segmented speech. But she can feel the other Pearl watching her and it makes her whole body lock up with an anxiety she doesn't understand.

She's just a Pearl, isn't she? Except…

She tells herself she is worrying over nothing, that she needs to focus, in case her Diamond chooses to give her an order, but it is hard. She is relieved when Blue Diamond sends her Pearl out to retrieve a package for her.

The conversation between Diamonds continues, meanders in ways other gems probably would not expect from their leaders. The courts are a subtle battleground of ideas, laden with manipulation and well-placed words. But Pearls do not tell all of the little things they hear.

And Pearls hear themselves in conversation too. They are entertaining, or well-behaved, or useful. They are old, or defective, or will be harvested soon. Yellow Diamond's Pearl hates these conversations. One day she will be the one that doesn't measure up.

"I should replace this one soon," White Diamond says conversationally. "She's a wonderful dancer, but she takes so long to run errands."

Yellow Diamond's Pearl knows this is because the Pearl has a small chip on one side of her gem, small enough to go unnoticed for a little while when you're just a Pearl. She knows how it got there, knows that now the Pearl always takes the quiet, deserted passages which take twice as long.

She doesn't realize that obsessing over self-preservation will only get her shattered faster. She wouldn't have much time anyway, but if she were smarter she would have figured out how to serve her Diamond at least a little while longer.

"Hmm, yes, she does seem a bit odd," Blue Diamond muses. "Mine is quick to obey, as always."

"Your Pearl is ancient," White Diamond laughs, "but I've long since given up on persuading you to get a nicer one. What about you, Yellow?"

Yellow Diamond's Pearl would tense up, would hide or cover her ears, but doing any of those things would be dangerous.

"Mine's adequate." Two words. No feeling behind them.

She feels empty. No, she feels relieved. She has succeeded in what she has worked for, for now. Adequate. She feels empty.

"She's been around for a while," White Diamond is saying. "I'm surprised; you're always so impatient with them." Yellow Diamond doesn't really answer, so she continues. "You ought to get a new one—there are some lovely new customization options."

White Diamond's words feel like a blade, slicing through Yellow Diamond's Pearl like she is nothing.

She _is_ nothing.

Yellow Diamond just gives her a cursory glance, says a dismissive "Perhaps."

It's all she can do to stay upright, hold her position without trembling.

Minutes pass like hours.

"Pearl, go speak to the Peridot working in the control room. I want an update on her progress."

An order. She can do that, at the very least. But for the first time she feels wrong for trying so hard.

She bows obediently and leaves, legs buckling beneath her as the door closes, and she can't even summon the strength to care that she is failing in her duties. She is nothing, she doesn't matter, her work amounts to nothing. It will not save her, it will not make her any different from the many, many Pearls before her. They had tried too, of course they had, but none of them could ever be enough.

She will never be enough, and she is no longer sure why she ever wanted to be.

"Pearl," a voice breathes from above her, not even a whisper.

She forces her wide eyes up from the floor and sees Blue Diamond's Pearl before her. There is only the slightest hesitation before the other Pearl slides her arms under hers and drags her to her feet with surprising strength. Before she knows it, they are in a tiny, dark room, alone. A storage closet, she thinks, but she can barely process what's happening.

"Pearl. Pearl, listen to me." Blue Diamond's Pearl takes her shoulders. "You cannot fall apart right now."

A hysterical laugh bubbles from her mouth.

She shakes her head. "No. You need to stop."

It's the shock of hearing any Pearl say "no" that quiets her more than anything else.

"I know you're scared," she continues softly, "but no matter what, you must perform perfectly for your Diamond."

"It doesn't _matter!_ " She's never cried before, but she considers it now.

"Yes, it does, but not in the way you think." The other Pearl's hands slip away, coming to rest lightly on her own chest, cupping either side of her gem. "Let me show you."

Yellow Diamond's Pearl doesn't even care anymore, doesn't bother to protest as the other's gem starts to glow, lighting up the room.

Blue Diamond's Pearl turns so it projects onto the wall, and what shows there is an unfamiliar sight. It is Blue Diamond's court, but not the court she occasionally visits with her Diamond, an older one, a different one. Gems she recognizes by type but does not know. And then two more, who enter from above, a Quartz and a—

A Pearl.

A Pearl with weapons, who wipes out multiple gems within seconds.

A _Pearl._

"We are the Crystal Gems," Blue Diamond's Pearl whispers in time with the projection.

It's too much, whatever the feeling inside her is. It's too much, but she no longer feels as broken as she did moments before.

The light from the projection fades and leaves them in darkness.

"What is that?" she whispers.

"Later," Blue Diamond's Pearl says. "During the next rest cycle. Now go, quickly."

She does.

* * *

Yellow Diamond's Pearl goes about her duties in a kind of daze, though she doesn't let it show. She makes sure to glare at the Peridot she's been ordered to speak to like usual, which isn't hard. The Peridot has the nerve to ask "Did you catch all that?" at the end of an elementary technical explanation. She takes the report back to Yellow Diamond, completely accurate as always, and stands tall until the end of the meeting, showing nothing on her face.

Inside, she is spinning and shaken and suspicious. How can a Pearl hold a weapon? How can a Pearl be part of a rebellion? How can a Pearl do anything besides being a Pearl?

She wants to stop thinking about all these dangerous, awful things that would easily get her shattered. She ought to dismiss it, she ought to pretend she never spoke to Blue Diamond's Pearl.

But her right hand is curled into a fist at her side and she can't stop thinking about what a sword—even just one—would feel like in her hands. She's never been allowed near weaponry. Pearls have no need for it; they are useless in a battle.

Except perhaps they are not, her near-perfect memory tells her, the images of slashing swords and defeated gems playing over and over in her head.

She had always assumed that she was the most a Pearl could hope to be, but what if she had been wrong? What if—

No. Those are forbidden, terrible things to think, for a Pearl. She can't let that weird ancient one get into her head. Whatever defective thing that was in the projection, it is long gone now, certainly. All traces of it erased. It doesn't matter.

She is a Diamond's Pearl, and she has more important things to dwell on.

More important things than swords and treason and another Pearl's shadowy memories.

* * *

It is all she can think about, even as she tries not to.

On the way to her rest cycle, she can do nothing but think, nothing but anticipate.

She shouldn't try to talk to Blue Diamond's Pearl. It will only lead to bad things, and she is trying to survive. That's all she's ever tried to do.

But that Pearl—that _Pearl_ with the swords—who was she? Why had she shown her that Pearl, and why did it matter so much?

She arrives first and takes her usual place, shoulders stiff beneath the fancy ruffles that adorn them. After a few moments, there is movement beside her and she glimpses the barest hint of Blue Diamond's Pearl, the folds of her skirt fluttering as she sits. They don't look at each other.

They do not move at all until every Pearl is there and the door has been closed and there has been nothing but quiet whispers around them for some time.

Then, and only then, does Yellow Diamond's Pearl dare to turn and look at the Pearl beside her. "Tell me."

Astonishingly, Blue Diamond's Pearl _smiles._ It is the first sign of life she has ever seen on her face. It is the first real smile she's seen from any Pearl, and the audacity of it terrifies her.

"5,750 years ago, she was a rebel fighting for a soon-to-be colony planet named Earth." The words are soft, shared only between them, but they seem loud and wrong and impossible.

"How?" she demands, matching the softness but with none of the pleasant lilting Blue Diamond's Pearl always manages. "She's a Pearl."

"So are we."

"She must have been defective."

"Gems throw around that word so much they don't even know what it means anymore." There's _disdain_ in her voice now, and it doesn't suit her—doesn't suit what she appears to be—at all. Stars, this Pearl is ten times scarier than she'd originally thought. 5,750 years. She's held this memory for 5,750 years, and it has festered inside of her. She is _different_ now, different from whatever she had once been.

Different like Yellow Diamond's Pearl is becoming every time she dwells on those swords.

"The leader of the rebellion was named Rose Quartz," the Pearl continues quietly in her normal tone. "They fought for the planet so the organic life there would not be destroyed in the process of colonization. I only ever saw the two of them, but there were more. They put up a fight."

"They lost," she says, with certainty, because they had to have lost.

"Yes," she admits, "but they allowed the planet to live for thousands more years than it would have gotten otherwise."

"What does that matter?" Yellow Diamond's Pearl hisses. "They're all broken. Homeworld doesn't let rebels like that live."

The other Pearl's teeth tug at her lower lip, like she wants to rip it in two. "It matters. She was a Pearl, and she _fought._ "

"The Quartz probably owned her."

She smiles again, suddenly, toothy and unrefined and startling. "No. She was one of White Diamond's Pearls."

Her gem burns with emotion she doesn't understand.

She shouldn't believe this. She shouldn't believe any of this, but the Pearl in front of her is so perfectly wrong that she can't imagine it being false.

"Haven't you ever wondered why she gets rid of them so quickly now?" she asks, some mix of pain and delight in her voice. Her fingers clasp in front of her gem. "She's scared."

"Diamonds aren't scared of anything. And it's ridiculous anyway, Pearls aren't a threat."

"Not if she doesn't let them live long enough to betray her."

This is wrong. This is very, very wrong. It's impossible.

Yet when she opens her mouth, all that comes out is "Let me see it again. All of it."

And Blue Diamond's Pearl, smiling and pretty and deadly, acquiesces.


	3. Chapter 3

Things are different now, but they don't act like it until all the Pearls are safely tucked away each cycle. And then, then they come alive with whispers of a Pearl that once existed and a rebellion that made a difference.

They watch the projection, play it over and over, and they echo the words of the renegade and the Quartz.

"We are the Crystal Gems."

They murmur it under their breath, mull over the unfamiliar designation. Crystal sounds sharp and beautiful on their tongues, and Gems is something they have never been allowed to consider themselves. They ache with fervor and excitement that doesn't know where to go—one because she has new hope, one because she finally has someone to share it with for more than a few moments.

They start calling each other "Blue" and "Yellow" because Pearl is too general a term and this act in itself feels like a sort of rebellion. The Diamonds shorten their names like this, and they dare to do the same in secret. It is a constant reminder that they are rebels, but also that they are owned. They cannot forget either of these things, or they will lose everything.

Early on, they come up with signals, simple ones that say things like "hello" or "let's talk" or "emergency", the last of which they hope never to use. Secret gestures that make it seem like they have something—a plan, a pact, a promise.

Meanwhile, Yellow finds herself craving the feel of a sword, of a hilt heavy in her hand, of a scabbard at her side, of gleaming metals that slice the air. First she imagines standing beside Yellow Diamond, at attention, with a sword clasped between her hands.

Then she imagines standing alone, hefting it into the air with a skill she does not have. She imagines other Pearls, all of the delicate ones she has disdained, doing the same. She imagines Blue, with the fiery animated voice that continues to surprise her, calling out the name "Crystal Gems."

She takes care to record every mention of Earth that she comes across as she works, repeating the information back to Blue with accompanying projections when needed. It is usually small, trivial things, but other times it is data on the Cluster that is embedded there and both of them feel an ache as they have to face the idea that the planet the renegade protected will be gone soon.

Yellow remembers the Peridot that insulted her Diamond not so long ago, and she tells Blue, but neither of them knows what to make of her. Why would a gem like that suggest deactivating the Cluster? What had happened on her mission that had changed her mind, given her the strength or foolishness to go against her Diamond?

She can tell Blue is hopeful, though she is not sure what she is hopeful for. Yellow, meanwhile, is baffled by the Peridot's behavior, but she refuses to see anything in it that she knows cannot be there. It is just a Peridot, she is not evidence of anything more than that.

Still, they talk together, pretend Earth is a place they can visit, piece together images from files and imagine that they can walk within them.

It is strange and fascinating and comforting. Yellow begins to live for these small moments, when she feels like she is allowed to just exist, when she is allowed to think and wonder things that she ought not to. If a Pearl can rebel, a Pearl can do many things. Now she can look proud because she _is_ proud, she is proud of the things she knows and the things she could know, instead of just her position.

She is a Diamond's Pearl, and she is something no Pearl should dare to be. She chooses the quiet rebellion that her friend—friend? Do Pearls have friends?—spreads without any hesitation, even though there is still so much of it she doesn't understand. But she has a goal, and she wants to know everything she can. She wants to do something. She wants to know, and then she wants to act. It lights a fire within her and she is impatient, doesn't know how Blue has known for so many years, and all she does is spread the story one or two Pearls at a time. One or two Pearls who do not usually live more than a couple thousand years, and that's if they're lucky. Pearls usually aren't.

What if they did more? What if, what if, what if, and she dreams of rebellions and swords and Crystal Gems.

* * *

"Thank you for telling me," Yellow says quietly, one day when they have talked all they dare and have lapsed into a comfortable silence. "I don't think I ever said that."

"I never expected you to," Blue replies with a tiny smile, then pitches her voice a little closer to Yellow's in friendly mimicry. "But that's no excuse."

She huffs and crosses her arms. "Well. _Thank you._ "

Their shoulders brush and Blue whispers a more genuine "You're welcome."

They are quiet, and they are safe.

* * *

"What would she think of me?" Blue asks one day, unusually reserved. Yellow is used to her unpredictable un-Pearl-like behavior now, and she doesn't want to ask what's caused this change today.

"She'd be proud," she says immediately, and she doesn't know whether the answer is meant to be the renegade Pearl's or her own.

Blue smiles.

* * *

"What would you do if you could leave?" Yellow asks.

"I can't."

"But what if you could?"

"I don't know. What would you do?"

"I don't know."

Blue laughs. "We're such Pearls still, under it all."

They both know that "Pearl" has two meanings now. One of them is the reality of what they are. The other is all the lessons they have been taught by Homeworld about what that means. They are hard to separate.

"I want to learn how to fight," she says suddenly, sharply. "I…I don't want to be a Pearl forever."

Blue understands, and she nods. "I think I'd like that too."

* * *

"I hate them."

Blue tilts her head serenely.

"I hate them all, they just…" Yellow makes a small, frustrated noise in the back of her throat.

"We're just Pearls," Blue reminds her, but there is no hint of resignation in the words, only defiance.

"I want to do something."

"Not yet."

* * *

They sit together during each rest cycle, but there is always a small break in the middle of their conversation as Blue shares her projection with a new Pearl. Their reactions vary slightly, and sometimes they speak in hushed tones like she did with Yellow, not believing their eyes, but it is still a fleeting thing. Every Pearl that sees it understands that it must be kept hidden, and all Pearls know that the best way to hide things is to keep silent and look pretty. Still, there is something that lurks behind the eyes of the ones that know.

Yellow understands the importance of this ritual, admires it even, but at the same time she does not. The renegade Pearl from five thousand years ago gives them hope, but that hope will never have anywhere to go for most of these Pearls if all they do is whisper. Why has Blue done it for all these years, for all the Pearls that come and go? And what of the unlucky ones, who don't get to hear it?

One day, she asks these questions.

"I have to," is all Blue says, and Yellow thinks that this is the most honest thing she has heard, even though no lies have been spoken between them. Pearls do not lie to one another. They need such constants in their lives.

"But why?" she presses, frustrated. "It's a story. It's not like it can save them."

"But she can," Blue whispers. "She saved me."

"She didn't even know you!" Yellow says before she can think, and it comes out cruel and cold and harsh.

The other Pearl feels it too, and her lips narrow into a thin line.

"I mean…"

"Doesn't it help, knowing she exists? Don't you feel better?"

"Of course, but that doesn't matter," Yellow replies, again too honest. "The Pearls here—you, me, all of them—we're not like her. We're not doing anything, we're just _sitting here_."

"We _could_ do something."

"When?"

Blue has no answer for this, and they fall into silence.

"What do you expect to happen?" Yellow asks impatiently.

"I'm not sure." She tucks her legs in and rearranges her skirt. "I'm waiting."

"There's nothing to wait for. You have to start doing something for them, something more than telling stories about a Pearl you never really met."

Blue's entire body seems to lock up in anger, and she moves infinitesimally closer. "You don't understand."

" _What_ don't I understand? Isn't that what you want? A…" Her voice drops to nearly nothing. "A rebellion?"

"Of course I do, one day, but I don't know how. Pearls would get shattered left and right before it even began."

"They're getting shattered anyway."

Blue's fists clench. "I know that. But this is all I can do for them."

"But it _isn't_ ," Yellow argues.

"I cannot fight a war," she says sharply, "and I cannot ask all of these Pearls to risk their lives for a rebellion that may never succeed. And you can't either. We need a leader, a strategist, gems that know how to do these things. Not just—"

"Pearls," Yellow finishes bitterly.

"You know what I mean."

"You mean we have to wait for stronger gems to come rescue us. Well, they're _not going to._ It's just us here."

Blue shakes her head. "We'll have those things one day—not stronger gems, but stronger _Pearls._ Pearls that can fight, that can organize a rebellion on the scale that would be necessary. That's why I tell them about her, so they know they can be more."

"Then let them."

"We can't be reckless—"

" _Not all of us live as long as you do!_ "

Blue freezes, hand fluttering out skittishly like she wants to soothe her, all anger gone. "Yellow…"

"Never mind."

"Yellow, I'm sorry. I know." Her fingers finally make their way to her companion's shoulder, tangling in the ruffles.

She wishes Blue could rip them off, damage the uniform Yellow Diamond so admires.

"I know it's not enough. I know other Pearls aren't as lucky as me; I watch them go, all the time. The only way I know to comfort them is to give them hope. I refuse to let them go to their shattering thinking there is nothing more to a Pearl than…than this." She shakes her head roughly. "I give it to everyone I can, even if it's not enough. And I remember them."

"What good is remembering?" Yellow whispers brokenly.

Blue puts a hand in front of her gem and it begins to glow as she extracts something from it. "Remembering means they won't be forgotten. They won't just disappear into nothing. I can honor them," she says more softly, mournfully. "That's all I can do for now. Remember."

The words sound nice.

And then she sees what is in Blue's hand—shards and dust and broken things, housed in a small glass container. A box of remnants, of remains, of Pearls.

Pearls do not scream, but the terror that rises in her throat brings her closer than she has ever come. To think of a Pearl—or any gem—housing these things inside herself is sickening.

Is this _remembering?_ Is this what she does, scavenges for bits of Pearl that no one will miss? Sticks them together in some container and pretends it's noble?

"No, no, wait, you don't understand," Blue begins, seeing the terror on Yellow's face.

"You—You're just— _collecting them?_ " she asks shrilly, would ask shrilly if they weren't in a room full of Pearls.

Blue hastily puts the box back into her gem. "No, of course not, I just—"

" _What's wrong with you?_ "

"I don't want them all to get repurposed and be erased completely!"

"Better to be harvested than to end up in there!" Yellow snaps. "Stars, you had me thinking the _Diamonds_ were defective and here you are saving shards like souvenirs—"

"Don't you dare talk about them like that!"

"Don't _you_ dare try to convince me this is normal. It's disgusting!" And even though her voice wants to rise and she wants to scream at the Pearl next to her, their fight is carried out in whispers and dies out into stillness.

They don't speak again for the rest of the cycle. They will never speak again, she is sure. Pearls are fragile things, and the bridges between them are just as brittle. They have to be, because Pearls do not last. But some Pearls, she thinks with a shudder as they stand to leave, some Pearls last forever in a box, never truly gone.


	4. Chapter 4

Yellow's work is long, and she feels more tired than she has ever been. She memorizes diagrams to distract herself as she files things away, but finds no satisfaction in it.

She tries to understand Blue's rationale and fails. She tries again. She wants to stop trying, but it is all she can focus on. Perhaps something inside of Blue really is defective, after all this time she has spent spreading stories about renegade Pearls in hopes of making a difference. Or perhaps…perhaps this really is her twisted way of honoring the ones that have been shattered. Perhaps it is not a rationale so much as a feeling.

It doesn't matter, she tells herself. They won't speak again.

It is later, much later, when she processes the new information. Earth, again. Her Diamond has some kind of preoccupation with the planet, one that seems almost irrational, but she is Yellow Diamond and she is not supposed to be irrational. When Yellow sees the latest reports, she has to look twice before she believes it.

Another Red Eye had been sent, to catalogue what was happening on that far away planet, and while this one had been destroyed as well, it had managed to transmit a fair amount of information back to Homeworld before it went offline.

Information that contained evidence of, amongst other things, a Pearl.

 _Blue's_ Pearl, the Pearl she tells stories about and seems to worship.

She stares at the image—Yellow Diamond has stepped out briefly and she's alone in the control room. The Pearl's gem is imperfect, an oval centered on her forehead and not the circle most Pearls have. There is a spear in her hand. She is different from the projections, but she is unmistakable.

Before she knows it, she is memorizing all the information in the file. Before she knows it, she is erasing every trace of its existence. Before she knows it, she has betrayed her Diamond.

Her rest cycle is soon, she tells herself, looking at the date in the corner of the screen. Her rest cycle is soon, and it is all she can think about. She mindlessly sorts the other files, the unimportant ones, because none of those contain the Pearl.

As soon as the time comes, she is rushing out of the control room, finding it hard, for the first time, to keep the even controlled pace of a Pearl. Thankfully the hallways are near empty and the only ones she passes are Pearls headed to the same destination.

She finds Blue immediately and makes the tiniest gesture telling her to join Yellow in their usual location. She doesn't respond.

Yellow gestures again, then makes their small, understood sign for _emergency._

That gets her moving. They settle beside one another and do not make eye contact. They do not speak until the lights have been dimmed for some time and most of the other Pearls are resting.

Then, suddenly, Blue's fingers are clinging to hers, trembling against her skin. "Tell me."

Yellow wants to push her away, feeling sick and wrong and defective. She has failed as the Pearl she was made to be, and she does not know where that leaves her. She is a fool, she thinks. She is such a fool, and all she can think to do is run back to this Pearl she doesn't understand.

"Please."

Yellow turns her hand and grips Blue's tightly. She wants to answer, wants to blurt out what she's seen, but first she has to know, has to get all of the dark things out of the space between them. "I need you to explain properly about…about the…"

She nods, just barely, and steadies their hands. "It's a ritual."

"A ritual?"

"On…On some planets, like Earth, there is a tradition the organic inhabitants often have for their dead. They hold ceremonies, and they put them in the ground…put up something to remember them by…" She hesitates. "I can never get away long enough to do something like that, but one day…one day I will. I'll make sure they are destroyed together, and I'll mark the place where I do it so they're not forgotten." She leans forward so that they are nearly nose to nose. "I know it's strange, and I shouldn't have startled you like that. I just want you to understand. I'm sorry."

Yellow is not used to apologies, but this one settles into her skin peacefully like warmth. She understands a bit more now—not completely, she doesn't think she'll ever understand completely—but she can see there is no malice in the strangeness and Blue is the same Blue she always has been. "I'm sorry too," she replies honestly, and she wants to say more but her head is still spinning with everything that has just happened. If she had her way, she would have much preferred being able to discuss their last conversation and sort through things, but she is a Pearl who does not have that luxury right now, not when there are bigger problems to be dealt with.

She can feel Blue's eyes on her, even though she can't see them, and she can tell she knows there are more than just apologies that they need to share. "…Thank you. But that wasn't an emergency."

"I found her," she whispers hurriedly. She cups her hands around her gem, blocking the light from the rest of the room. Small images of the file flash up, and she zooms in on the Pearl with a spear and a determined smile.

Blue stares, unmoving. The beginnings of tears start to drip from under her long bangs. "How?" she whispers finally.

"I don't know. There are others. An Amethyst, some kind of fusion, and another one I don't recognize. That Peridot is with them too." Yellow shuts the projection off.

"Oh my stars, she's—she's _alive._ " Feverish laughter tries to escape her throat, and she manages to force it back. "After all this time. I-I never thought…"

"I deleted the file," Yellow says, because she doesn't have the time or the patience right now to deal with emotions.

Her head jerks up. " _What?_ "

"I just…I deleted it," she repeats. "If Yellow Diamond saw, she would have…"

"Yellow, _no_ , why would you risk—"

"I'm cracked anyway," she whispers. "I'm going to be shattered soon, I can tell, things have changed. She's just looking for an excuse." The reassurances do not calm either of them, and she feels herself trembling.

"But you…"

"At—At least this way they won't go after her, right? For a little while?"

"You're insane," Blue says, looking conflicted. She grabs at both of her hands and holds them in a death grip. "You _know_ you have to be more careful than that, you've always known that. _Why?_ "

Yellow doesn't know. She hasn't known anything since Blue showed her that first projection, just that nothing she knows about Pearls and about herself is real.

"We have to get out of here."

She freezes, having expected to hear some kind of goodbye. Instead, she is receiving something else entirely. "What?"

"I said we have to get out."

" _What?_ "

"Shh." Blue inches closer. "If we can get to Earth, maybe she can help us. All of us."

"You're the insane one; there's no way we could get to Earth, it's galaxies away!"

"But we could _try._ "

"Even if we get there, there's no guarantee she can do anything—"

"Then we'll find another way, if she can't." Blue watches her closely from under her bangs. "Please. We have nothing to lose anymore."

"I thought you wanted to keep telling Pearls about her."

"I thought you said that hope is no good without action behind it." She smiles faintly. "You were right. So let's do something. Together."

"Blue—"

"I have dreamed for millennia about getting even one chance to see her again. If I can do that, and if I can do _anything_ for Pearls…" She touches her gem lightly. "That's what I'm for."

A Pearl, deciding her own purpose. Yellow finds herself smiling, and doesn't understand it all because she ought to be scared or upset or resigned to her own fate. Instead, she is looking at a Pearl that has overturned every assumption she has ever made about her own kind. A Pearl who is offering her a chance in return for the dangerous favor she had done without thinking. She doesn't regret it at all.

She is shattered, and she is free, and whatever she chooses—she can _choose_ now—will be worth it.

And, even from the beginning, there has never been any doubt that she will choose this.

She looks at the Pearl that once terrified her—still does, in some ways—and sees the urgency on her face and the anxiety in her tightly-wrapped fingers and the _care_ in all of it. She is a Pearl, only a Pearl, always a Pearl, but there is someone who cares and who does not want to see her die.

She answers the only way she knows how, with a straight back and stiff shoulders and every ounce of pride she can muster.

"Yes."

* * *

They plan quickly. They will need a ship, they will need to avoid whatever forces are sent after them, they will need to provide evidence of their destruction so that the Pearls here will not be punished for their actions.

Yellow finds the ship that will be best suited for their escape—a large one, to grab attention, but more importantly one that holds a sizeable escape pod, able to function on its own.

Blue leaves the planning to her and stands, hands fluttering above her head to get every Pearl's attention. They look up at her, startled.

She doesn't dare raise her voice loud enough for all of them to hear, so she communicates in simple gestures and projections. Points to herself and Yellow, shows them a picture of a ship taking off, a brief flicker of Earth and then holds on a picture of the renegade Pearl.

Most of them know this image, and it brings a light to their eyes. For the ones that do not know, she plays the memory over, letting it flicker onto the wall as she carefully shields the light from going towards the door.

Blue touches Yellow's arm when it is finished and gestures for her to show them the more recent image of the renegade Pearl, which she does in haste.

She has never seen a group of Pearls look so present, buzzing with energy in the almost perfect silence of the room.

Blue gets their attention again, points to the two of them and the renegade, shows the ship again, and then Homeworld. They will come back, she tells them, her hands clenched in excitement. She mouths "rebellion" and motions to the room at large.

There are too many silent reactions to take in, and Yellow pulls Blue back down to the ground to whisper her plan into her ear. Blue nods, then holds out her hand, waits for Yellow to slide her cold fingers over her own, before holding out the other to the Pearl on her left.

The Pearl stares at it for a moment, then touches her gem lightly before her fingers find their way to Blue's. _I will stand with you_ , her eyes say. She holds out a hand to the next Pearl.

Gradually, each and every one does the same, wordlessly pledging loyalty to a rebellion they had never expected to be a part of. A circle of Pearls that weaves imperfectly back and forth around the room, connected.

Yellow is smiling again, holding hands with Blue and the other Pearl she always sits with, who looks strong and unshaken for once. They are all strong in this moment—they are together. They are all alive and brave and a little bit reckless.

They are all Pearls.


	5. Chapter 5

The benefit to being Diamonds' Pearls is that no one even thinks to wonder why they are walking together or why they are headed in precisely the opposite direction they should be. No one bothers to question them until they are all the way to the docking bay, and then they just stammer out important-sounding lies like they're good Pearls. Simple.

The bay is deserted, several ships waiting for their next deployment, and Yellow is quick to point out the one they will be taking. It's not a war ship, just a transport vessel, but it has the standard set of weaponry attached and it's designed to be secure enough for elite gems to travel in. It suits their needs, because they know they will be drawing attention no matter what, and Homeworld will not lose anything important with this ship. If they can execute their plan properly, the incident will be big enough to cause embarrassment but small enough to cover up with a few select words.

No one would want to admit it was a couple of mere Pearls that caused the ruckus, and so there would be no significant retaliation. The Diamonds would know, but they would not be willing to break the status quo for something like this. The other Pearls will have to be careful, but they are used to that, and they will be safe.

The two of them make their way over to the ship, not breaking character for even a second. They are very nearly there when a loud voice stops them in their tracks.

"What are you doing here?" the large Quartz demands—a Jasper, Yellow notes, furious with herself for not moving just a little bit faster. They had almost made it. She lowers her eyes, all too aware of the destabilizer on the Jasper's belt as she continues. "Blue Diamond has been asking for her Pearl, and we've been looking everywhere!"

Blue slips easily back into her role, head lowered, hands clasped. "I'm sorry, Yellow Diamond requested that we complete this task—"

"Well, you don't _belong_ to Yellow Diamond, do you?" she snarls.

Blue flinches, and that much might be natural. It's not like she could say no to any Diamond if it really were the situation, no matter who she was made for. "I'm sorry," she repeats meekly.

"And you!" she says, turning on Yellow. "Don't think I won't be speaking to your Diamond about this!"

Yellow goes rigid, seeing the strike coming before it hits—hard, sharp on her face. She stumbles back, falling to the ground as she's expected to, but a small and bitter part of her thinks it would have been all too easy to avoid. Not that it mattered—it wasn't aimed anywhere near her gem, and she knew everyone was careful not to get caught breaking a Diamond's property.

"Now come on," the Jasper says, roughly hauling Blue away by the wrist. "Let's get you back to Blue Diamond."

Blue lowers her head in obedience, though Yellow can see her fingers dance at her side inconspicuously. _Wait._

She wonders _for what_ and can't help but think their hastily concocted plan is a waste after all. Even if she makes it to the ship, she doesn't stand a chance on her own. And if by some miracle she did, she refuses to even consider letting Blue get dragged back to her Diamond again to wait and wait and wait.

But then she sees what Blue is going to do, just a second before she does it.

She lags behind a little, twists around so fast the Quartz holding her doesn't have time to react before her own destabilizer is being shoved into her spine.

The Jasper barely manages a scream before she is gone.

It's almost too easy, she thinks, but then again, no gem would ever be on guard when she's just with a couple of Pearls.

The gem drops to the ground with a _clink_ and she stares as Blue switches the destabilizer off and collapses it.

"What—" An alarm starts blaring overhead.

"We need to get out of here." Blue grabs her arm and drags her over to the ship.

They reach the door just as half a dozen other gems are running in to see what's happened. "Stop them!" one shouts when they see the destabilizer clutched in Blue's hand.

The two of them exchange one tiny glance before they throw themselves into the ship, diving to either side so that they're not easy targets.

Yellow finds the control panel and slams her hand over it, closing them off. "Let's go!" she urges Blue. "We need to get to the helm!"

They rush along the hallways to the control room, already hearing the electric whir of weapons being powered up and aimed at the ship, trying to disable it before it even gets off the ground.

She is infinitely glad she memorized these blueprints.

They barely hesitate at all before throwing themselves into the seat that should hold an elite gem—not a Diamond, but certainly someone of a much higher status than a Pearl.

Yellow activates the ship's controls immediately, eyes flashing over the various screens. "Shields rising, rerouting power, controls accessible via alternative—"

A blast shakes the entire ship, and she's thrown sideways out of the chair as nearly a quarter of the room goes up in smoke.

"Are you okay?" Blue gasps, picking herself up and then hauling Yellow off the floor as well.

"Yes, yes, we just need to get out of this gem-forsaken room before they blow us to pieces!" Yellow hurriedly taps one of the screens hovering next to the chair and then pulls Blue back out the way they came, more blasts already rattling the abandoned control room. "The escape pod is this way; I've rewired the controls so I should be able to access everything from there."

"Should be?"

"Well, I _did_ get interrupted," she snaps. "Come on, hurry!"

The ship's intercom blares out a message above them. "Attention. Attention. This is the Yellow Diamond control room. You are ordered to stop immediately. Surrender yourselves."

"Oh, _be quiet_ ," Yellow snarls. Ridiculous Peridots, always acting so superior, even when they're the ones that have to play a Pearl's part in her absence.

Blue skids to a stop at the nearest communication link and activates it. "Control room, status update: _We're not taking orders._ " An angry flurry of words comes back in response, and she looks immensely satisfied.

"Oh my _stars_ , are you trying to get us killed faster?" Yellow demands, impatiently dragging her the rest of the short distance to the escape pod. "Get in, quick."

They throw themselves into the pod, which looks something like a miniature version of the control room they were just in, though thankfully more intact.

"You do actually know how to pilot a ship, right?" Blue asks, and it strikes Yellow as strange all at once—the two of them speaking at a normal volume, alone.

Nervous pride swells in her chest and she imagines the scandalized and shocked looks of the gems she's had to work with for years. A Pearl, piloting one of their ships. "Of course I do," she replies haughtily, allowing a wide, smug smile onto her face. She strides over to the pilot's seat, sits down, and activates it with no trouble whatsoever. More benefits to being a Diamond's Pearl—they don't have to worry about being denied access to anything here.

"Good," Blue says. She walks over to the communication panel, still buzzing with incoming messages, and rips it out of the wall. It falls to the ground, breaks and splinters and goes silent. "Let's go."

Yellow's hands skim over the controls rapidly, with practiced ease a Pearl should not have. She checks the shields—fully raised and deflecting all of the attempts to stop them now—and starts undocking so quickly that they're nearly out of the bay before anyone can even board another vessel to try and intercept them. She steadies her hands. "Hold on tight."

Blue grabs the edge of the control panel in front of her just as the ship accelerates. Yellow maneuvers around the other ships and the projectile weapons being fired at them—useless ones, because they don't want to risk damaging the station—with skill even she hadn't been fully aware she possessed. She jabs a finger into the panel that activates light speed travel and they're both flung backwards, Yellow's back slammed against a seat that's too big for her and Blue's fingers leaving small dents in the panel she's grabbed.

They're flying.

A laugh bubbles out of their throats, almost synchronized, and they lock eyes, wild with the rush of freedom they feel with Homeworld at their backs.

"We did it!" Blue yells, letting go of the panel just as the stabilizers kick in and tumbling backwards to land beside the pilot's seat, hair a flyaway mess that Blue Diamond would never have allowed.

"Could you hold off on celebrating until we've lost these clods?" Yellow shoots back, though she is just as giddy. "I'm trying to fly this thing."

Blue gasps in delight at the derogatory language neither of them would have dared to use before. "Can I help?"

"I could use a navigator."

"At your service," she says with a mock Diamond salute.

Stars, they're both insane to be doing this, and it's wonderful.

There's a total of two ships coming after them—just two, because they're a couple of renegade Pearls and they can't possibly put up much of a fight.

Well, Yellow thinks with a smirk, she'll show them exactly how mistaken they are. "Slide that over here," she says, pointing to a screen just out of her reach. Blue slings it her way with slender, darting fingers. She catches it on her fingertips and navigates through the menu, which is unfamiliar but easy enough to figure out. "You take the controls," she says, slowing the ship down before passing them off to Blue. She drags the navigation screen over to hover beside the one she's already holding.

"I don't know how to—whoa!" Blue exclaims as they careen off to one side.

"Just hold it steady!" she yelps, rearranging Blue's fingers onto the right controls. "It's not that hard to go in a straight line." She turns back to the weapons screen and powers up the lasers to the highest possible setting, small vibrations shaking the engines with the power. "Firing."

Lasers shoot out behind them, pinpoint shots that hit the control rooms and engines of both ships. Yellow swipes her finger sideways for good measure, a spectacular light show slicing through their pursuers' vessels and cutting them in half.

"Oh my stars," Blue breathes, staring at the debris shown on the screen.

Yellow sits, frozen, hardly believing that she just destroyed two ships with gems much stronger and more experienced at the helm. She's only jerked out of her daze when the stars on screen seem to begin spinning in a slow counter-clockwise motion.

"Give that back!" she says, snatching the controls away from Blue. "I didn't get rid of them just so you could send us crashing into the nearest planetoid!" She rights the ship and steadies it.

"That was amazing," Blue says breathlessly, barely listening. She throws her head back, brushing her bangs completely out of her face for the first time. Her eyes are bright and alive and Yellow has never seen anything so stunning.

She shakes her head, mind racing. They probably only have minutes now before reinforcements arrive. "We need to blow this ship up _immediately._ "

"Wait," Blue says suddenly, "we can't, not yet." She reopens the doors that connect them to the ship. "The equipment—we can take it with us, maybe we can use it. At the very least, we're going to need weapons, and destabilizers are better than nothing." She rushes out before Yellow can even begin to protest and runs down the hall to a main computer terminal.

It only takes her a few seconds to tell the ship to deliver a full supply of equipment to her location, and she gathers it precariously into her arms.

Yellow sets the controls on auto-pilot and runs over to help. Together they manage to transport it back to the pod quickly, dumping the box onto the floor. " _Now_ can we get out of here?" she asks.

"Ready when you are," Blue agrees. She straps herself into the second seat and pulls up the navigation screen again.

"Initiating emergency protocol. Commencing detachment." Yellow flicks through various screens again. "I'm going to turn off everything that safeguards the main engine's power source; hopefully the explosion will make it seem like a result of external stimuli."

"Will we be far enough away from the blast? This pod has shields, but…"

"We're going to take off right as it detonates," she replies, switching to the pilot controls. "I'll make it jump to the highest possible speed, so make sure the course is laid in properly."

Blue checks it over again and nods. "It's locked in. We're good."

"Okay, brace yourself." Yellow quickly adjusts her own straps to make sure she doesn't go flying. "Three, two, one— _now!_ "

There's an earsplitting explosion and Yellow slams her hand onto the controls, slinging them away from the blast just in the nick of time. With any luck, no one will even notice the residual trail the pod leaves; the debris and radiation from the main ship should hide it.

It takes a few moments for the pod to adjust to the rapid-fire acceleration it's not really built for, but soon they are slumped safely in their seats, unyielding straps likely the only thing keeping them upright.

"Did we…just…" Blue pulls her hair to one side, searching out Yellow's eyes. "Did that work?"

Yellow nods, speechless.

"It _worked!_ " She laughs, hands excited and restless and everywhere. "It worked."

"We're going to Earth," Yellow says, staring at the screen in awe.

"We are!" Blue deactivates the straps, leaps up from her seat, and runs over to Yellow, taking her hands and clasping them tightly between them. "Thank you."

"It's—You're welcome," she says weakly, still a little stunned that they aren't dead.

"Thank you," she says again. She lets go and stands beside her, tall and strong and absolutely certain. There's a flash of light a moment later, and she sees Blue's meticulously styled outfit replaced with a practical, near-exact copy of the renegade Pearl's clothes. It remains all blue, but has a brightness and vibrancy to it now that matches her eyes. "How does it look?" Blue asks, overflowing with nervous energy, though it is easy to see she has been thinking about this for some time.

"It looks right," Yellow says, and she undoes her straps and stands up as well, with the sudden urge to do something just as rebellious and drastic and daring. She phases off the uniform she has worn her whole life and replaces it with the same simple design Blue is in. She nearly paints herself in yellow—she always has, after all—but she stops, hesitates. She is different now. So instead she makes it a pale, dull gray—so bland no one would ever choose for their Pearl to wear it. It's strange, and it's perfect, and she wonders at the impossibility of everything they have done.

"You too," Blue replies, and she seems like such a different Pearl than the one who used to stand silently beside her at meetings. But she is familiar and reassuring, even when they are both shaken and exhilarated by this newfound freedom.

She could easily make a detailed list in her head of each and every rule they have broken, but she does not regret any of it. Homeworld is behind them, and that gives her a sharp, uncertain clarity she has never known. Because Homeworld is wrong, and it is time for change.

It is time for things like rebellions and swords and renegade Pearls.

Yellow looks down at herself and tugs lightly on the fluttery piece of fabric around her waist, so different to what she has always worn.

She looks at Blue, who is calm and fierce and still, staring at the stars and touching the gem on her chest like she is pledging her loyalty to them.

They are no one's Pearls now.

There's something that feels wrong about this, to both of them, because they still cannot shake _just a Pearl_ , but they have already done so much and they cannot stop now. So they stand together. So they cry and laugh and scream because there is no one to tell them not to and they have the whole universe at their fingertips, even though they know exactly where they will go.

They are Pearls, and they are Crystal Gems, and they have chosen their purpose.


End file.
